Just (Another) Quick One : Hobbies,  Passion and Being a Mom

I was looking at my Instagram feed when I saw this photo by one of my high school friends. An aspiring photographer who takes above average photos (not that I have high standards) and he,  just like me,  loves using nature as his subject.

I went on looking at his photos when I realized that I used to love taking photos and looking at nature photography.  Now,  I just love looking at them.

I know most parents experience this at one point especially stay-at-home moms like me.  That moment when you suddenly just miss doing those things that you’re terribly passionate about,  like photography for instance. You can feel the passion,  the excitement and the anticipation thinking when you can do the things you used to do. Somehow imagining what you would do and where you’d go to when you get the chance. For a minute,  you’re flying there planning with a little too much bit of excitement.

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Panaginip

Tahimik na nakaupo si Isay sa kusina habang nakatingin sa kanyang cellphone. Balisa at paulit ulit na binabasa ang mga text,  tinitignan ang call history at pati na rin ang mga nasa gallery.

Alas-dose na ng gabi nang lumabas si Kardo sa kanilang kwarto at tinabihan si Isay.  Inakbayan nya at hinalikan sa ulo ang kanyang asawa. 

“Sino ka? ” tanong ni Isay habang nakatingin pa rin sa cellphone. “Sino ka ba talaga? ” dahan dahan nitong tinignan ang lalaking tumabi sa kanya. 

“Asawa mo ‘ko,  ‘di ba? ” sabi ni Kardo na lalo pang hinigpitan ang akbay,  sabay ngiti. 

Pinakita ni Isay ang mga text ng kapatid nya. 

“Naaksidente si Kardo,  nandito kami sa. ospital”

“Ate,  wala na si Kuya.  Dead on arrival daw”

Tumawa ng malakas si Kardo. Tawang nakakapanindig balahibo.  “Alam mo na pala”, sabay pisil sa balikat ni Isay. 

Dahan dahan itong nilingon ni Isay. Isang nakakatakot na nilalang na ang katabi nya. 

“Sabi sayo ako ang asawa mo,  ako ang tunay na asawa mo” 

Hindi na makagalaw si Isay. Pinilit nyang sumigaw at kumilos.  Bigla syang nagising,  panaginip lang pala. Pagbangon nya, naulit nanaman ang lahat. Hanggang sa magising syang muli. 

“Kardo,  patay na ang asawa mo.  Binangungot.”

Almost

She’s slowly walking in the crowded hall filled with lovers slowly dancing to a romantic song. She’s  nervous, this is her first time. 

Elegance never worked for her but tonight, she really did her best. Flowing pink gown,  a bit of jewelry and a little trip to a salon for a make over. It’s not as good as how she imagined it but it’s the closest she can get. 

She saw him seated beside a window,  giving them a breathtaking view of the city lights. Heart pounding faster and faster,  she kept calm until she finally joined him in their table. 

They talked about everything like they always used to. She knew this will be their second chance together. She already had this scenario in her head countless times before. 

After having their dinner,  he asked her to dance. They swayed sweetly,  she smelled the same scent and memories came back.  Memories of why they broke up before. 

Back to their table,  he finally said “I’m marrying her next month. We’re pregnant. ” Shocked,  she can’t think of anything to say. 

Who knew?  They’ve been seeing each other again for the past four months.  Who would’ve thought? 

Right,  she’s her best friend. She’s the bridesmaid.